My final show at Indi Go Artist Co-Op.

FinalShowThe art of Loving.

Living is the art of loving.
Loving is the art of caring.
Caring is the art of sharing.
Sharing is the art of living.
If you want to lift yourself up, lift up someone else.

It’s a rather sing songy Booker T. Washington quote. I like the awkward situation of whether this quote is a dictation, it seems rather biblical. But not actually, more of if someone treated Booker T. Washington’s statements in a biblical sense. But fine, alright, I liked it because of the obvious relation to my name and how I can connect with the thought it purposes in the text.

This month has become a month of puffy eyes. Parties and working 65 hours for sad events and packing and leaving and reexplaining to everyone everyone everyone why I’m doing this. And there’s distractions from said course of travel not in a defining manner where I throw it all away. Shit, it took two years to get here. I’m going damnit.

My father sent me a thank you card for helping him with his show. I haven’t read it yet. My father has exquisite handwriting. These things make me cry. Because I used to be a really bad kid.. like terrible to my parents and to other people. And I’ll live my whole life remembering that and trying to work towards what I should be instead.

I took down the entire gallery show tonight and Emily and I wrote out our thoughts on how it went. Might as well share it with the world right?

The show took us 65 hours last week to install and 2 1/2 hours to take down. We took the back of one of our posters and made 4 sections titled: Love, Impact, Improvements, and Feelings. It’s good to sit back and review something after it’s over.

Love
– The ‘pubical’/being able to use an unused space.
– The color, the warmth.
– Working together. (Em & I)
– Making a huge dream come true.
– The Spanish sex cartoons in the pubical
–  The golden trophy vagina entrance, the fact that we didn’t nix it at the last moment, and that people had to duck and step into it.
– Healther Ault
– Mari
– The events: Art therapy workshop Wednesday, MFA dance performance Thursday, V-Day Monologues and benefit concert Friday, our reception/my going away party on Saturday, and ending it all with tango into the evening.
– The dress I wore.
– The pubical becoming the “boom boom room” for multiple people. I don’t care if people have a problem with that.
– My parents came.
-Period in the boom boom room.
– The fun people had with the trophy vagina entrance.
– That on Monday night I had the bright idea to add words to the streams of fabric.. and we did. We worked on that section of the display for.. 19 hours. But now it can be re-used by RACES for other art shows and displayed in their office.

Impact
Negative
– Empowering the empowered.
– Less community support then desired.
– It may have been slightly clique-y.
– Lasting-time- elements that keep and hold people in the gallery.
– The title “Read Between the Legs: She’s in There” scared people.
– GT Hardwick the building owner- talking to me in a sense that he was blaming the victims.
– Valentine’s Day? Todd Marshall an artist and a friend finding the scene to be more happy go lucky than extreme women strength and empowerment. But he’s a man.. so ya. He thought with it being a fundraiser for RACES that it ought to be darker.. we disagree.
– Bloody period floor.. extremely embarrassing.. until Emily laughed at the situation and made me feel better. 🙂

Positive
– Visual strength
– Exposure for RACES
– Created dialogue, even if people didn’t come they saw the name and talked about it. It even created dialogue in the form of crying in the arms of a boy Friday night and telling my dreaded personal story. Not the boy in the picture.

– More people were exposed to the potential of re-use material.
– We set the bar very high for all other BFA senior thesis shows this semester.
– The title scared people.
– Personal empowerment for future development. We inspired ourselves to keep thinking about this topic.
– The volunteers we had were inspired, their diligence to the project helped increase their interest and inspiration.
– We all talked about rape. Our own rapes, those of friends and mothers and how the United States is the number 9 on the list of percentage of women raped. How that is not not acceptable.

Improvements
– Start sooner
– Better manipulation of the fridge in the pubical.
– Artwork more directly related/ finding more people who create artwork we desire.

– A more defined theme so that we don’t have to continuously defend it. It should be completely apparent what we were saying.
– Sending a personal email to people about the event, I just ran out of time.
– More time for the display to be up.
– Public art.
– More visual presence on the street.
– More people here during staffing. I often felt when people came in that I didn’t want them there because I wanted my alone time with the space. I know that is bad but it’s how I felt. Staffing could have helped with that situation.
– Troops of people on the street promoting. We originally had an idea to have people run around like sperm..
– More fundraising efforts/people who have money attending.
– Personal invitations in the form of origami vaginas, something that got nixed.
– More volunteers
– More interactive pieces.
– Not completely exhausting ourselves. Wednesday morning I began at 9:30 am.. I left at 7 am and was back again at 12:30/1 pm until 3:30 am. I didn’t look that great at the party because I was.. exhausted. I even developed an eye infection.. jeesh.

Feelings
– Wow
– Barely anyone gave me feedback on the fact that there was a nude photo of me on the wall. (But apparently very good things were said to Emily.)
– I felt strong and happy in the space.
– I felt sad by the demeanor of some of the art students. They turned inward on themselves when we wanted them to.. expand, explode, talk to us.
– Putting this at the end.. what can I do now?
– Great starting point for further campaigning for our cause. Ladies Sewing Circle and Terrorist Society unite!
– Friday was amazing.. minus the hitting the parked car and being belligerent.
– Struggling with humility. Getting sick and tired of answering the when are you leaving, where are you going, what is your background, what are you doing there, blah blah blah.. Feel like I need to carry around my resume and just hand it to people. Here, if you need to know sooo badly.
– Re-Use this was my component of the show. Feedback on that from Em’s professors/my ideas as well.
+ Pulling anything and everything together to make something beautiful.
+ Labor of Love
+ The method of sewing, a form of protest. Showing angst and madness.
– My monologue- I decided shortly before the event which one I would do. I hadn’t read it out loud until I got up there. I created the way I delivered the message as I was saying it.
– We didn’t always get what the other was doing but that was ok.. Love my dear friend Emily so very much and will miss her immensely. After we go to law school, let’s rule the world dear.

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